D.E.A.R. Is Born

I like to do what I can to help people.  I think I've found a way to do just that.  I would like to formally announce the creation of D.E.A.R  The acronym stands for Derek's Expert Analysis and Recommendations.  My goal is to not only to help people by pointing out things that need to be changed, but I also want to help encourage and help them to find ways to accomplish that.  I want to kick this thing off with something that is very close to my heart.  Without further ado, D.E.A.R. PART I...

Dear people who start your facebook status with “Dear (fill in the blank)”,

I wanted to write to inform you that this style of status writing has run its course. I must admit that I was once pulled in by the bright light of sarcasm that seemed to ooze out as the words were typed. As a lover of everything sarcastic, it seemed that I found all of the things I was looking for in one little package. I consider myself to be one of the pioneers of this writing style (Seriously, I went back and checked dates to make sure...)

For those not familiar with what I'm talking about I'll give you a couple examples so you can feel more in the loop.  We'll start with an easy one: "Dear pants, thanks for making me feel even fatter than you did the last time."  Or, if I wanted to go all out then my status may read as follows: "Dear Arby's, thanks for getting my order wrong.  I really wanted a piece of lettuce drenched in mayonnaise in the place of three pieces of bacon and Swiss cheese.  I will be sure to come back soon."  I hope that helped.  Now, let's move on.

As one of the pioneers who helped introduce this trend to facebook-dom, I also feel that it is my duty to assist in its disbanding. Just as it goes when a hilarious joke has been told over and over again, there comes a day when you desire nothing more than finding any way to ignore a teller of that joke. In the beginning it can be the funniest thing you've ever heard, but after the five-hundredth time you want no more of it.

I believe that one day all of this “Dear So and So” and “Dear Such and Such” nonsense may be able to make a comeback. In fact, I think it is possible that it could make a comeback and be bigger than ever. The crucial part is that it is forgotten for a while now, allowed to leave, and able to come back bigger and stronger than ever.

In the mean time I challenge all of you to find a new way of writing. Find that new way that is original and distinctly you. It's time for a new trend. I have complete faith in all of you. Well, the people that read this anyway. Those who don't apparently don't have very good taste in the first place.

Love-
   Derek

P.S. Please know that this was not intended to be directed at any one specific person. I even waited a couple of days to post this to try to avoid even the appearance of it being directed at anyone.